I will go to the ends of the earth for actor Zoey Deutch (Flower, Buffaloed), but I have to draw a line at Chad Hartigan’s nonsensical romantic-dramedy The Threesome. An indie that positions the ambitious performer as a second, sometimes third, banana portraying a waffling love interest.

Deutch plays Olivia, a sarcastic server, who incessantly teases guy pal Connor (Jonah Hauer-King of 2023’s The Little Mermaid). This sharp-tongued playfulness turns Connor on, but Olivia has made it clear she’s not romantically interested in him. But when Connor has an impromptu connection with Jenny (Ruby Cruz of Bottoms), a woman who’s been stood-up at Olivia’s restaurant, the firey bestie works her way into their “meet cute” and, soon, all three adults are sharing an evening of sex and intimacy.

Hartigan (Morris From America) and screenwriter Ethan Ogilby have aspired to provide audiences with a sophisticated and mature film that talks frankly about how sex can complicate relationships, and how selfish decisions can deter entire lives. But because Ogilby’s characters are paper-thin, equipped with a single motivation and a snarky attitude, the audience can’t invest in the love triangle. This is especially problematic when both women become pregnant after the “sexcapade”, leaving Connor to split his focus and grow up. What further hampers The Threesome is how the film assigns Hauer-King as the lead, pushing Connor’s arc to the forefront and overshadowing his more interesting co-stars.

The Threesome, packed with enough “will-they-won’t-they” tension to fuel entire seasons of pre-teen soap operas, quickly devolves into several make ups and breakups up until the bitter end of this laboured and long flick.

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Addison Wylie: @AddisonWylie